anger management and public transportation

On my way to work a boda (motorcycle) driver pulls up in front of me.  "We go?"  He asks eagerly.  My face drops and I quickly go from enjoying the nice weather on my short walk to work, to annoyed.  "No, we don't go" I snap back.  My step becomes more determined and I no longer greet the people who walk past me.  Another boda driver pulls up next to me, this one had to go entirely out of his way to offer me a ride.  "Muzungu, where are you going?"  He questions expectantly.  Surely he is shocked when I yell back, "I am FOOTING" in pure frustration.  

Last week a taxi driver tried to charge my friends and I double the cost of the ride we took.  Having taken this route countless times, I knew the fare should be 500ush/person.  When the conductor rudely informed me that it was 1000ugx a person and then attempted to close the door before my friends could leave (essentially holding them hostage), I became irate.  I actually don't have a clear recollection of how the "conversation" transpired, but evidently I called the man an asshole, told him he was going to hell for lying, and threw money in his face.  He drove off while giving me the finger, and I felt uneasy for several hours after the altercation.

Public transportation makes me a crazy person, and these two anecdotes aren't even the tip of the iceberg.  My reactions of anger, however, are irrational and unproductive, and ultimately only harm me.  Intellectually, I KNOW why I am overcharged and offered rides when I don't want them.  I am well aware that I am living in a country where poverty is overwhelming, where even many professionals live on subsistence level incomes.  I appreciate that the economy here is making it harder and harder for people to make enough money to live.  And I am always conscious that I am beyond privileged, in almost every way.  Intellectually, nothing I am confronted with here is outside of rational.  If you thought you could make an extra buck (thereby doubling your income for the day) by overcharging a couple of muzungus who probably don't know the difference anyway, would you?  Probably, yes.  I imagine that is pretty easy to rationalize.  

So, why does it make me so inexplicably angry?  I honestly don't know.  But for my own well-being, I need to start acting on the intellectual understanding I have of the complex systems of poverty and inequality at play here and start treating people more compassionately.  

When I walk home from work later today a boda driver will inevitably pull up in front of me and say "Muzungu, we go?"  I will take a deep breath and smile while responding, "Not today, sebo."  I will continue walking, continue smiling, and continue working at being a positive presence in this world.  That's our biggest responsibility to ourselves and others, after all.