field work

For the second week in a row, I am in the field. I am surprised by how difficult it is for me to be away from the comfort of Kampala, a place I now consider home. Field work is both exhilarating and exhausting in equal parts.

While last week in Kamuli district I could only consider myself a participant observer in the field, this week, in Lira, I am a leader. Today I trained our research assistants, translator, and interpreter and tomorrow we commence the baseline survey. I wrote the field guide, crafted the protocol, and will eventually lead a team in analyzing the data we collect this week. I feel empowered, but also heavily responsible for the quality of the data we collect.

On Friday my coworker thanked me for writing the research assistant training manual. He told me that I made his job easy. I left work smiling. Today another coworker told me that my training went smoothly and I felt accepted. This evening I skipped dinner because of exhaustion and an inability or lack of desire to socialize. My coworker just knocked on my door; she bought me juice and apples. For the first time, I felt connected and cared for. Work-life is starting to feel comfortable. As the matatu/taxi says, "patiency pays."

I am happy to be out of the office this week, get my hands dirty in qualitative research, and reflect on where I am and what I am doing. As we drove north today (on the same route I would take to Pader), I felt tense and anxious. Northern Uganda represents my personal failure. Perhaps this week, in a small way, I can redeem myself.